Hiram answers the telephone, and it’s an emergency room
doctor.

The doctor says, “Your wife was in a serious car accident, and
I have bad news and good news. The bad news is she has lost
all use of both arms and both legs, and will be on a respirator
the rest of her life.”

Hiram says, “My God. What’s the good news?”

The doctor says, “I’m kidding. She’s dead.”